COMMISSIONER MONEY FOUND
Gen. Leonard leads rescue mission
By R.E. Porter, Associated Web Press
NFFA commissioner William D. Money was rescued late last night in North Korea, the apparent victim of a kidnapping plot planned and executed by his own daughters and deputy commissioners, Mo and Cash Money, the AWP has learned.
In what has been described by one eyewitness as “a bold and daring mission,” Money was rescued by a small band of commandos lead by Gen. George Washington Leonard from a combination prison and opium den in a small North Korean village. The commissioner had not been seen or heard from in more than nine months.
Although no arrest warrants have been issued for the Money sisters, they are wanted for questioning, according to FBI spokesperson Nita Knowles. “It is my understanding Mo and Cash Money will be interviewed later today at the bureau’s offices in Nashvegas,” Knowles said.
A spokesperson for Leonard, Captain Larkin Lode, said the General had received a tip from Jorge Linardo which led to Money’s rescue. “Apparently quite by accident, Mr. Linardo overheard the Money sisters discussing the location where the commissioner was being held,” Lode explained. “And being the patriotic citizen that he his, Mr. Linardo immediately communicated with the General.”
The North Korean government had no official reaction to the news of Money’s rescue, but according to an anonymous government source, North Korean dictator Kim Jon II is furious over the incident and suspects that Triki Bobber, the disgraced and criminally insane owner of the Fidalgo Island Sea Hogs, was somehow involved. A long and friendly relationship between the two recently soured when the dictator discovered Bobber had been paying him in counterfeit currency.
More to come on this developing story.
In what has been described by one eyewitness as “a bold and daring mission,” Money was rescued by a small band of commandos lead by Gen. George Washington Leonard from a combination prison and opium den in a small North Korean village. The commissioner had not been seen or heard from in more than nine months.
Although no arrest warrants have been issued for the Money sisters, they are wanted for questioning, according to FBI spokesperson Nita Knowles. “It is my understanding Mo and Cash Money will be interviewed later today at the bureau’s offices in Nashvegas,” Knowles said.
A spokesperson for Leonard, Captain Larkin Lode, said the General had received a tip from Jorge Linardo which led to Money’s rescue. “Apparently quite by accident, Mr. Linardo overheard the Money sisters discussing the location where the commissioner was being held,” Lode explained. “And being the patriotic citizen that he his, Mr. Linardo immediately communicated with the General.”
The North Korean government had no official reaction to the news of Money’s rescue, but according to an anonymous government source, North Korean dictator Kim Jon II is furious over the incident and suspects that Triki Bobber, the disgraced and criminally insane owner of the Fidalgo Island Sea Hogs, was somehow involved. A long and friendly relationship between the two recently soured when the dictator discovered Bobber had been paying him in counterfeit currency.
More to come on this developing story.
