Jack White leads the Leonard Four-nette while Mojo D (not pictured since he was curled up in the fetal position behind the amps) intones Ferlinghetti
By Soren Bernyn
FSN
The venue fit the mood Monday night as media, Corsairs front office and faithful fans gathered at The Blue Room at Third Man Records, home of Corsairs coach Jack White.
The crowd anticipated epic, celebratory debauchery for the Corsairs' fifth playoff berth in a row; but after a blistering 8-0 start, the Corsairs have dropped three straight games, and the Corsairs boss was not happy.
The room was heavy with languor and nerves, as a visibly distressed and intoxicated GM Mojo D addressed the 450 friends, fans and media gathered at the Pie Town club that has become HQ for the Downtown Corsairs: “we ran the table in the first half of the season and swept the Black Dogs - two things we take great pride in. But I fear we started believing the media, which has bit us in the ass - a 3-game skid mark is unacceptable. We clinched the Linardo (Division), but only because the other three teams suck - two weeks in a row for a Jorge sweep? That’s unheard-of, but it means we’re going to the playoffs again, and for that, I’m grateful.”
Mojo D screeched "happy f*cking Thanksgiving, motherf*ckers!", signaled the bartenders to start pouring blue Solo cups of Playoff Punch-You-in-the-Mouth for the assembled masses, and brought coach Jack White to the stage. The mercurial musical and coaching genius [Corsairs lead the NFFA in Power Rank, Efficiency and All-Play percentage] led his newest art-rock quartet, “The Leonard Four-nette,” in a dissonant, feedback-filled, 60-minute improvisational opus backing Mojo D’s reading of Lawrence Ferlinghetti’s A Coney Island of the Mind, his voice processed through an increasingly disturbing series of distortions. By the closing chords, only a dozen or so people were left in the Blue Room, but Mojo D did not see the crowd leave, as he was laying behind the amps, rocking himself and sobbing silently.
