By Soren Bernyn
Fantasy Sports Network
After an epic, up-and-down nail-biter in their Week 1 loss to the Boca Chica Daddies, Mojo D was Scott Van Pelt's guest during the ESPN host's hit segment "Bad Beats" Tuesday night. The Baller-in-Chief wasted no words: "It's the baddest beat in the history of bad beats, SVP! Somebody's lord and savior let down the team tonight - maybe the Almighty herself knocked that ball out of Lamar's hands - twice."
In case you missed it, the last 30 seconds and overtime were quite eventful for the Ballers - at the end of regulation, the Daddies and Ballers were tied at 180.4 (after Jackson's kneel-down erased a scant .1-point lead); in overtime, Jackson regained the lead on a short run, only to fumble on the next play, leading the Ballers to drop their first game of the 2021 season, 180.4-177.8.
Baller-in-Chief Mojo D was distraught and unhinged, even by the Ballers' very loose standards. After a lengthy diatribe on the new 15-week regular season (including describing fellow NFFA owners as "g*ddamn troglodytes messing with perfect symmetry"), he blamed the loss squarely and solely on QB Lamar Jackson: "anybody who says it never comes down to just one play is full of sh*t."
When Van Pelt - a regular at the SportsBook, according to Club Gitmo insiders - questioned Mojo D's coaching gaffes (particularly WR Tyler Lockett on the bench with 22 points), the Baller-in-Chief unleashed a stream of profanity that verged on glossolalia. When Van Pelt cut to commercial, Mojo D stormed off the set - complete with a hot mic which captured his disjointed mumbling about "lizard people," "ants under my skin," "godless Bakers" and "where's that confounded bridge?"
Mojo D's current whereabouts are unknown, but he has already set his lineup for Week 2.
More on this story as it develops.
