 |
| After being formally introduced as the Independents' head coach, Beyoncé rode off with owner Suzy Fine to oversee the team's preseason draft. |
By Ariel Mutha-Tafoya
FSN Sports
If the newest ownership group in the NFFA wanted to make a statement to the rest of the league, it wasted little time. Less than an hour before the annual preseason draft began, the South Franklin Independents announced their new coach with just one word: Beyoncé.
And they did it in a style not quite evident before in a league where style points count.
A brief, social media-driven campaign invited Independent fans and members of the press to Harlinsdale Farm for “a big kickoff announcement” last night. But there was little clue as to what would follow. At 6:30 sharp, with several thousand fans gathered near a large barn in front of a hastily assembled stage, team owner Suzy Fine rode up on a black horse, dismounted, and welcomed the crowd.
“Look up!” Fine said. “We’re about to tear the roof off this league! I want you to meet our new head coach!”
At that moment, fans saw a gold helicopter heading their way. The chopper touched down in the field behind the barn, out of fans’ view. A few seconds later, Beyoncé emerged from the barn, followed by a phalanx of 12 Tennessee Walking Horses with female riders in matching outfits. Remaining in formation, the horses moved choreographically behind her as Beyoncé performed “Run the World,” a 2013 hit about female domination.
The crowd, stunned at first, broke into sustained cheers as the song ended and Beyoncé took the stage to speak. “Hello, South Franklin!” she yelled. “Are y’all ready to run the world?”
As the crowd cheered again, Beyoncé continued, “I’m a football fan, but I wouldn’t agree to coach just any football team. But when Ms. Fine called me about this opportunity, in the greatest fantasy sports league of all time, I was in. Now we’re here to tell the rest of the NFFA: ‘Times up, boys!’ And now we’re going to work!”
As Beyoncé and Fine left the stage together and rode off on horseback, huge banners were unfurled with the team’s logo, which prominently featured Midnight Sun, the famous walking horse who sired 2,600 foals. One banner included the slogan, “Who’s Your Daddy?” while the other read “Run the World.”
As fans left, each received a swag package that included a “Who’s Your Daddy?” Independents licensed t-shirt, car flag and window decal. A flyer inside the gift bag noted that, in 65 of the past 69 years, the Tennessee Walking Horse World Champion had carried Midnight Sun’s bloodline. In case fans missed the point, in 64-point type at the bottom of the page were the words: Independents: Total Domination Is in Our Blood.”
Even before the announcement a few minutes later that ground would be broken near the site for a new stadium to be known as the Beyhive at Harlinsdale Farm, observers across the league were abuzz. “The NFFA is no stranger to larger-than-life figures,” said reporter Woody Larry. “But there’s never been a figure here like Beyoncé. I saw her show at Coachella. Beyoncé doesn’t just contend. Beyoncé crushes.”
No comments:
Post a Comment