BAKIN' PLANS FOR THE PLAYOFFS
12th Avenue clinches first-ever playoff berth in loss
By R.E. Porter, Associated Web Press
Normally, clinching a fourth-straight division title and the number one seed in the playoffs would be enough to make the headlines. But not in the face of a historic first, preserved for eternity by now-suspended 12th Avenue play-by-play announcer Lorenzo "Lo" Kwashius: "The Bakers make the playoffs, the Bakers make the playoffs, Jesus-[expletive]-Christ, the mother-[expletive] 12th Avenue Bakers have made the mother-[expletive] NFFA playoffs.'
Yes, QCurl Sharif and his 12th Avenue franchise ended seven years of disappointment and heartbreak last night, even while being trounced by the undefeated Linardo division champions from East Nashville.
Reached at Bakers headquarters this morning, Sharif said about his team's historic accomplishment: "It brought tears to Mother Sharif's eyes. This is what we play for."
Continuing Sharif said, "Still, we have to bolster the troops for the Bacchanal [game against West Nashville]. This one is huge for us in terms of image — oh yeah, and momentum. We've got to get back some of that early season swagger.
"God bless the Bakers and God bless Amy Winehouse," he added before signing off.
The East Nashville Black Dogs continued their own historic season with their win over the Bakers. The Dogs not only clinched a league-record, fourth-consecutive division crown and the number one playoff seed, they matched their NFFA record for wins in a season (12) from a year ago and ran their record for consecutive regular-season victories to 19.
12th Avenue was not the only franchise to clinch a playoff berth last night. The West Nashville Beelzebubbas clinched their second-straight trip, and need to win one of their final two games to secure the number three seed. Owner-coach Boyd X. Biggs was busy finalizing last-minute details for this week's Bacchanal — he was negotiating with Nicolas Cage, who wanted to enter the planned chariot race as a free-lance competitor — and was not available for comment.
In the L division, the playoff picture became a little more clear with Atlanta's win over Fidalgo Island. The Smack Daddies need one win against either the Alamo Scouts or the Midtown Mojo to clinch the division crown and the number two seed in the playoffs.
Yes, QCurl Sharif and his 12th Avenue franchise ended seven years of disappointment and heartbreak last night, even while being trounced by the undefeated Linardo division champions from East Nashville.
Reached at Bakers headquarters this morning, Sharif said about his team's historic accomplishment: "It brought tears to Mother Sharif's eyes. This is what we play for."
Continuing Sharif said, "Still, we have to bolster the troops for the Bacchanal [game against West Nashville]. This one is huge for us in terms of image — oh yeah, and momentum. We've got to get back some of that early season swagger.
"God bless the Bakers and God bless Amy Winehouse," he added before signing off.
The East Nashville Black Dogs continued their own historic season with their win over the Bakers. The Dogs not only clinched a league-record, fourth-consecutive division crown and the number one playoff seed, they matched their NFFA record for wins in a season (12) from a year ago and ran their record for consecutive regular-season victories to 19.
12th Avenue was not the only franchise to clinch a playoff berth last night. The West Nashville Beelzebubbas clinched their second-straight trip, and need to win one of their final two games to secure the number three seed. Owner-coach Boyd X. Biggs was busy finalizing last-minute details for this week's Bacchanal — he was negotiating with Nicolas Cage, who wanted to enter the planned chariot race as a free-lance competitor — and was not available for comment.
In the L division, the playoff picture became a little more clear with Atlanta's win over Fidalgo Island. The Smack Daddies need one win against either the Alamo Scouts or the Midtown Mojo to clinch the division crown and the number two seed in the playoffs.
