Bakers' history. He credits a higher being for his success.
By Faith Popcorn
Bakers PR Director
NASHVILLE — As the clock wound down in the 12th Ave. Bakers' narrow win over Cambridge this past Monday night, head coach Snoop Dogg could be seen shaking hands on the sidelines with each of his players. Tears were streaming down his face.
"This was big for us -- staying alive," he said in the locker room afterward. "We got a big old stinky scalp a couple of weeks ago with the Beelzebubbas, then lost a close one to the Black Dogs — a loss that still hurts. I owe an apology to the Baker Nation and to Drew Brees on that one.
"So, we were against the wall last Monday night with the Animals. In the past, this would have been a game the Bakers would have lost ... but now, there's something in the air around here. I knew Portis would chump it somehow. I called it...I told Money earlier that day that he'd get about 14 carries for 40 yards. He went 14 for 43. That's what Mr. TD used to call 'chump-ass shit.' Now we seem to be heading in the right direction again — even though I haven't been able to find any of the team for practice this week."
Dogg also noted that the shaking of hands on the sidelines was more than a mere show of respect and gratitude — it was the actual passing of 'special Baker artifacts.' These artifacts are given out in lieu of game balls according to the Bakers front office.
"I want my guys to feel the love," said Dogg. "We haven't been scoring lately but we still win ugly. It's a ju-ju thing. Teams don't want to play us because they know we love each other. You can feel the shine when we come out onto the field. I expect them to win — and they are addicted to these artifacts. Then I want them to go home or come down to the Cherry Bomb and get it on, fo' shizzle. That love is part of the secret weapon...
"I talk to Shiva and higher spirits during the season and I receive blessings and an understanding of the cycles of this world. QCurl has joined me on occasion and — trust me — we have seen the glowing jewel. It turns and makes your skin warm. Amy, Michele and Obama are there. My fellow owners are there and I can see right through them."
When asked about the upcoming game with the Midtown Mojo — the hottest scoring team in the league — Snoop grinned. For a moment he seemed lost in time. The grin froze and his eyes rolled up into his head ...
"We know monkeys better than anyone," he said. "The feast begins now."
