tonight, but didn't specify which team.
HOW THE SCOUTS WILL BEAT THE BAKERS
By Larry Woody, Tennesseeya News Services
Admittedly, I am among the dwindling disbelievers, remaining a staunch skeptic regarding 12th Avenue's alleged transformation into a playoff contender; but being in Nam taught me to be a disbeliever. Believe me, the Alamo Scouts will pull out a victory over the Bakers this evening.
The Scouts have four players (TE Dallas Clark, PK Adam Vinatieri, LB Keith Bulluck, DB Courtland Finnegan) tonight, while the Bakers have two (PK Rob Bironas, DB Chris Carr). Trailing by just over 40 points going into tonight's finale, here's how Thurman Murrman and his miracle boys will do it:
Vinatieri kicks three field goals and one extra point for a total of 10 points.
Clark catches four balls for 50 yards and a touchdown for a total of 11 points.
Bulluck, the self-annointed Mr. Monday Night, will get his usual share of the tackles, let's say eight, plus a sack where he forces and recovers a fumble, then returns it for a touch. That would give him a total of 21 points.
Finnegan has already demonstrated his affinity for the pick six — as has Peyton Manning — and Finnegan will get one tonight for 65 yards. Add in a handful of tackles (4) and another pass defensed for a total of 23 points.
The four players' projected scores total 65 points, which will give the Scouts a final score of 167.5.
For the Bakers, let's say Bironas has a pair of field goals and a pair of PATs for 8 points. And let's project Chris Carr to have 11 points on kickoff returns and 2 points on punt returns for a total of 13. Those additional 21 points would give the Bakers a final score of 164 and their fourth loss.
Read it and weep, Bakers fans. In fact, if the Bakes don't lose, I will climb atop a billboard in the 12 South area and remain there until the Bakers have a losing record; which will make me more of a sitting duck than I was in the latrine at Pleiku.
On a related note, Scouts matriarch Eudora "Meemaw" Murrman, who dubbed the four remaining players The Four Skilleteers, has called for a pre-game, prayer vigil tonight in parking area Q of Grey Goose stadium to pray for a Scouts victory. She requests that all Alamo fans bring their Bibles and their skillets.
The Scouts have four players (TE Dallas Clark, PK Adam Vinatieri, LB Keith Bulluck, DB Courtland Finnegan) tonight, while the Bakers have two (PK Rob Bironas, DB Chris Carr). Trailing by just over 40 points going into tonight's finale, here's how Thurman Murrman and his miracle boys will do it:
Vinatieri kicks three field goals and one extra point for a total of 10 points.
Clark catches four balls for 50 yards and a touchdown for a total of 11 points.
Bulluck, the self-annointed Mr. Monday Night, will get his usual share of the tackles, let's say eight, plus a sack where he forces and recovers a fumble, then returns it for a touch. That would give him a total of 21 points.
Finnegan has already demonstrated his affinity for the pick six — as has Peyton Manning — and Finnegan will get one tonight for 65 yards. Add in a handful of tackles (4) and another pass defensed for a total of 23 points.
The four players' projected scores total 65 points, which will give the Scouts a final score of 167.5.
For the Bakers, let's say Bironas has a pair of field goals and a pair of PATs for 8 points. And let's project Chris Carr to have 11 points on kickoff returns and 2 points on punt returns for a total of 13. Those additional 21 points would give the Bakers a final score of 164 and their fourth loss.
Read it and weep, Bakers fans. In fact, if the Bakes don't lose, I will climb atop a billboard in the 12 South area and remain there until the Bakers have a losing record; which will make me more of a sitting duck than I was in the latrine at Pleiku.
On a related note, Scouts matriarch Eudora "Meemaw" Murrman, who dubbed the four remaining players The Four Skilleteers, has called for a pre-game, prayer vigil tonight in parking area Q of Grey Goose stadium to pray for a Scouts victory. She requests that all Alamo fans bring their Bibles and their skillets.
