New Ballers coach "Mystery" Mike Tyson says "I'm ready for the challenge"
By Søren Bernyn
Fantasy Sports Network
Fantasy Sports Network
After an epic lineup failure led to the team's ignominious loss to the Cambridge Animals in Week 2, new Buena Vista Ballers coach Iron Mike Tyson stormed out of the team's watch party at Club Gitmo's Bitcoin Bunker.
On his way out, he stopped briefly to vent on "the joke that is Mojo D -- I'm trying to coach using data and strategy, and he comes around and changes the lineup with shit like 'high upside' and 'play the matchup.' It's a wonder the team keeps going to the playoffs: those other teams must have really sucked."
The Champ continued: "He treats me like it's a f*cking joke, so I'm delegating coaching duties to my animated alter-ego, 'Mystery' Mike Tyson (from the critically acclaimed Adult Swim series Mike Tyson Mysteries)." He stepped into his Bugatti Veyron and sped off, leaving the Ballers' faithful gob-smacked and wondering what will happen with their team this season - after predicting a repeat championship in 2020, the team has slipped to 0-2 and now has a cartoon coach.
Some wags commented that Mojo D has always been a cartoon character, so this is not too different. To this reporter's knowledge, the NFFA has never had an animated cartoon-character coach, but this is 2020, and nothing is off the table.
Stay tuned to this breaking story...
No comments:
Post a Comment