good at his weekly media conference.
MCMAHON: I AM SCARED OF DAVE THE ANIMAL
By R.E. Porter, Associated Web Press
At his weekly media circus held at fooBar, East Nashville coach Jim McMahon was near-euphoric and it wasn't because of the Morning Glory margaritas he was consuming. No, McMahon was high on the Black Dogs 5-0 start.
At the beginning of the season, McMahon allegedly confided to West Nashville owner/coach Boyd X. Biggs that he had challenged his team to shatter the record for regular season wins they set last season with a 12-2 mark by having a perfect season in 2008. When asked if he indeed had made such a challenge to his team, McMahon said, jokingly, "I can't recall.
"But what I do remember is that dating back to last season, the Dogs have won 12-straight, regular-season games. And according to Elias Sports Bureau, that is also a new NFFA record and counting. So, yeah, life is good — at least in the East Nasty.
"And actually, life is pretty damn good in the entire Jorge division," he continued. "Every team has a winning record, and overall, the division is 14-6. But unfortunately, the same cannot be said for the Linardo division. Talk about your weak sister. Only one team has a winning record, and their overall division record is a pitiful 6-14.
"It makes me wonder if they should change their name from the Linardo division to the Linardo subtraction?" he deadpanned, which got a few laughs from the members of the media in attendance.
"But seriously, folks, we've got a tough division game against the [Cambridge] Animals this weekend at the Dog House. Three weeks ago, when Dave the Animal took home the Coach of the Week award, QCurl [Sharif] told me it made him 'sick to see the Animal's ugly face' on the NFFA site. I can only imagine Q is so sick of seeing his face by now that he is throwing up because Dave's face has been there every week since then.
"So, let's face it, this will be our toughest test to date. The Animal is some kind of genius and I admit he scares me, and I don't mean his team. I am scared of Dave the Animal as a person. You know, he's some kind of meth kingpin, which makes him a really scary mofo.
"So, after we put the big bite on his team this weekend, I'll definitely be watching my back."
McMahon spent the remainder of the conference drinking margaritas and testing the remaining reporters' knowledge of Latin phrases. He stumped them with Disce aut Discede, which means learn or depart.
At the beginning of the season, McMahon allegedly confided to West Nashville owner/coach Boyd X. Biggs that he had challenged his team to shatter the record for regular season wins they set last season with a 12-2 mark by having a perfect season in 2008. When asked if he indeed had made such a challenge to his team, McMahon said, jokingly, "I can't recall.
"But what I do remember is that dating back to last season, the Dogs have won 12-straight, regular-season games. And according to Elias Sports Bureau, that is also a new NFFA record and counting. So, yeah, life is good — at least in the East Nasty.
"And actually, life is pretty damn good in the entire Jorge division," he continued. "Every team has a winning record, and overall, the division is 14-6. But unfortunately, the same cannot be said for the Linardo division. Talk about your weak sister. Only one team has a winning record, and their overall division record is a pitiful 6-14.
"It makes me wonder if they should change their name from the Linardo division to the Linardo subtraction?" he deadpanned, which got a few laughs from the members of the media in attendance.
"But seriously, folks, we've got a tough division game against the [Cambridge] Animals this weekend at the Dog House. Three weeks ago, when Dave the Animal took home the Coach of the Week award, QCurl [Sharif] told me it made him 'sick to see the Animal's ugly face' on the NFFA site. I can only imagine Q is so sick of seeing his face by now that he is throwing up because Dave's face has been there every week since then.
"So, let's face it, this will be our toughest test to date. The Animal is some kind of genius and I admit he scares me, and I don't mean his team. I am scared of Dave the Animal as a person. You know, he's some kind of meth kingpin, which makes him a really scary mofo.
"So, after we put the big bite on his team this weekend, I'll definitely be watching my back."
McMahon spent the remainder of the conference drinking margaritas and testing the remaining reporters' knowledge of Latin phrases. He stumped them with Disce aut Discede, which means learn or depart.
